


On Oak Farm

by betweentheheavesofstorm



Category: Earthsea - Ursula K. Le Guin
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, F/M, Mutual Pining, One Shot, Unresolved
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-26
Updated: 2018-12-26
Packaged: 2019-09-28 03:43:03
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,632
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17175200
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/betweentheheavesofstorm/pseuds/betweentheheavesofstorm
Summary: ‘Ogion told me where to find you,’ he says, stiffly.She knew she’d see him again. He was bound to turn up sooner or later. She’d just expected it to be later.





	On Oak Farm

She nearly closes the door in his face.

It’s a good thing she doesn’t, though, because Apple runs past her out the door, shouting something indecipherable over her shoulder.

Tenar looks back at Ged. His hair is beginning to grey and his jawline has thickened slightly. It makes his face look older. She pushes a strand of hair out of her face, doing her best not to feel self-conscious – but Ged’s eyes are turned towards Apple and her speedy progress across the yard.

‘That’s Apple,’ Tenar says. Maybe he already knows that; mages have a way with names.

‘Ogion told me where to find you,’ he says, stiffly.

She knew she’d see him again. He was bound to turn up sooner or later. She’d just expected it to be later. Nor had she ever envisaged having _this_ conversation, in which she presents and defends her children.

‘I’m sorry for appearing like this,’ he says, and she realises that his stiffness is awkwardness. He’s forgotten how to talk to her – he probably hasn’t spoken to a _woman_ in years, the way the mages carry on. She, however, can remember her manners.

‘Please come in,’ she says, stepping back and trying to sound normal.

And then Ged is in her house, light-footed on the timber floors as she leads him through to the kitchen. She’d been in the middle of cutting up plums to stew and whatever it is he’s come here to say, he can do it while she works.

‘It’s a nice house,’ he says. ‘Very light.’

‘Let’s have it, then,’ she says, picking up the fruit knife. ‘What’re you here for?’

He’s faintly surprised at her tone, she can tell. Not just because she’s being assertive, but because it makes her sound so maternal. She’s a far cry from the trainee priestess he met in Atuan.

He pauses, and then: ‘I need your help.’

Some of the plums aren’t really soft enough; she’s going to have to add more sugar or the mixture will be sour and then the kids won’t eat it.

‘What is there that needs doing that the Archamage can’t do?”

‘It’s not a matter of doing. It’s a matter of understanding.’

It’s all so wrong, Ged in her kitchen. Ged leaning against the weathered table, watching her slice plums.

‘So you’re asking me.’

‘It’s old magic. Nobody else I know has seen anything like it.’

There have been times when, wrapped up in farm life, she momentarily forgets that there was anything before this. It’s only ever a fleeting thought; when Apple is fussing and won’t sleep or Spark has scraped his knee when climbing a stone wall. And now the Archmage is in her kitchen with a problem involving sorcery.

‘Old magic,’ she says. ‘Like what we buried.’

Ged nods. She knew he was going to, but had hoped he wouldn’t.

‘In Atuan?’

He can’t ask her to go back. Surely he knows that. Nowhere in the Kargad Lands would be acceptable, but to Atuan -

‘No,’ he says. ‘No, I wouldn’t ask that.’

Before she can ask more, Flint arrives in the kitchen. She hadn’t heard him come in, he must have arrived minutes after Ged.

Her husband’s eyes slide from her to the strange man opposite and immediately bristles.

‘Flint,’ she says, with calm she does not feel, ‘This is my friend.’

‘Sparrowhawk,’ says Ged, politely.

Flint says nothing, but walks past him to a chair at the other end of the table. Once seated, he removes his boots and then speaks directly to Tenar.

‘Goha, have you finished the plums?’

‘Almost.’ She collects the sliced halves into a saucepan. Out of the corner of her eye, she can see Ged watching Flint, who in turn is staunchly ignoring the visitor.

Where does Ged want her to come? He must have realised by now that she has to refuse. Flint might be able to manage the farm alone, but then there’s the children to think of. Nor is he likely to be happy at the idea of her skipping off with the Archmage.

She can’t fret about it for too long; Spark and Apple come into the kitchen squabbling about something and she has to sort them out. Then there’s dinner to prepare and the kitchen to tidy. For now, at least, the magic problem will have to wait.

Once they’ve calmed down, the children notice the visitor.

‘That’s Sparrowhawk,’ she tells them. ‘He’s an old friend of mine.’

Apple loses interest, but Spark watches the mage curiously. Ged smiles obligingly back – even though, Tenar suspects, he doesn’t know how to talk to kids.

Spark starts asking questions then, in an impetous tone he’s discovered recently. Does Sparrowhawk live on a farm and does he know about animals and has he ever been on a boat? They start talking about boats, then, Ged telling Spark about sailing and explaining how different wind spells work. Tenar notices after a few minutes that Ged is being careful to avoid talking too much about sorcery.

At the other end of the table, Flint has grown restless. He rises and moves to join Tenar. Laying a hand on her forearm, he asks if her friend is staying for dinner.

‘I would assume so,’ she says, feeling a twist of guilt at her husband’s unease. Raising her voice slightly, she calls across the kitchen. ‘You’ll be wanting dinner, Sparrowhawk?’

‘If it’s no trouble,’ Ged answers.

‘And you’ll stay the night here?’

He shakes his head. ‘Best start back tonight.’

Flint watches the exchange coolly. ‘What exactly does your friend want?’ he asks, keeping his voice low.

‘He has come to ask me a favour.’ Tenar starts cutting potatoes. This year’s crop haven’t been the best; they’ve come out very small.

‘What favour?’

‘I don’t know yet.’

Flint harrumphs, and leaves the kitchen. Spark notices his father leave and makes a small movement as if to follow him, but the lure of Ged’s sailing stories prove too strong.

 

Tenar isn’t sure how she makes it through the evening. Even though Ged is unfailingly polite, she can’t suppress a flicker of resentment at his appearing so suddenly. Did he have to come _here,_ to her farm and her family? Is he trying to show her what she gave up or convince her she made the wrong decision?

Flint doesn’t make things any easier. After a couple of inquiries as to where Ged is from (‘You’re Gontish?’) he lapses into silence, stabbing each piece of stew as if to vent an unspoken frustration. He’s further riled up by Spark’s interest in the visitor, until he snaps and tells the boy to go to bed early. The ensuing fuss gets to Apple as well and Tenar can’t help wishing that Ged was getting a better first impression of her family.

She doesn’t get the chance to speak to him properly until after dinner. He insists on helping clear up, which makes Flint snort with barely concealed derision. Still, then they’re alone, and she’s free to ask the question that’s bothered her all evening.

‘Where do you want me to go?’

‘North,’ he says, after a pause. ‘Bereswek. It’s not that far from Gont – ’

‘I can’t,’ she says. ‘You must have seen that. My children…’

‘Are old enough to survive without their mother for a few weeks.’

‘It isn’t just that. I have the farm, and Flint.’

Ged puts down the cloth he is holding, momentarily abandoning his task. ‘If it were just you…do you want to come?’

Ogion would have taught her magic. They don’t take women on Roke, but he would have taught her if she’d stayed.

‘Yes,’ she says, though it pains her to admit it. To trade Flint and Oak Farm for sorcery and _Lookfar_ is an unthinkable choice. She has _children._

‘They could come,’ Ged says, as if reading her mind. ‘Your children. They would be safe.’

‘How safe?’ she presses. ‘If you need my help … oh, it doesn’t matter. Flint would never allow it. Even if I said you were the Archmage and reminded him how I came to Gont he would dig his heels in.’

‘He called you Goha,’ Ged says, remembering.

‘I can have more than one name. He’s a good man, Ged.’

‘If you’re happy,’ he says, though he does not sound convinced. ‘Your son looks like you.’

‘I don’t see why you should sound so accusing,’ she says, deliberately lighthearted. ‘You were never going to give me children.’

That catches him off-guard. He manages an awkward laugh. ‘That’s true. Though I think I would be a good farmer.’

‘I still can’t come with you.’

‘I know,’ he says, ‘but I had to ask.’

‘Next time I demand more warning,’ she tells him. ‘Suddenly appearing like this – it’s not good for anyone.’

He nods. ‘Next time.’ And then, glancing at the door, ‘I better be starting off.’

She steps closer to him, suddenly unsure if she wants him to leave. ‘Is Ogion well?’

‘Yes.’ His face looks softer in the candlelight. ‘I will see you again, Tenar.’

He reaches out and touches her face lightly, stroking her cheekbone with his thumb. He is not using any magic, she can tell, but even so she’s immobilized, unable to move or speak. Then his hand falls to his side. He looks like he wants to say something further, but can’t articulate it.

‘Good luck, Ged,’ she says quietly.

He leaves swiftly, collecting the staff he had left in the hall and walking out briskly into the cold night. Tenar closes the door behind him and turns to find Apple sitting on the stairs.

‘Is he a mage?’ Apple asks. ‘He has a staff like one.’

‘Yes,’ Tenar says, thinking about _Lookfar_ sailing up to Bereswek. ‘He is.’

**Author's Note:**

> It's been ages since my last reread of Tehanu, so there may be the odd inaccuracies. While I really love the structure of the Earthsea books and the fact that Tenar and Ged don't get together until after everything else has happened, I also had a need to write this.
> 
> I've got no idea if anybody reads Earthsea fic so this may just float in the void, but if you do read/like it, please let me know!


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